The Final Comedown

2019 has been a big year for me in terms of running. Having completed my first marathon in 2017 then spending 2018 smashing PBs in all other distances I decided that 2019 I was going to go all out in terms of long runs.

In April, after a few months of solid, injury free training, I ran the Magna Carta marathon, along the River Thames, completing it in just over 4 hours which was a surprise to everyone, most of all me. I appreciate I’m no Kipchoge but this was a pretty speedy marathon time for me.

Then in June I ran the Weald 50k, my first ever ultra marathon. A race that I really enjoyed where I found that I was able to unleash a second wind once I got past marathon distance. Possibly a sign that an ultra runner persona lurks within me somewhere.

September was the New Forest Marathon. I have been looking at this race for a number of years as my Dad lives fairly close by and we had our family holiday here over the summer so I had been really looking forward to it. Unfortunately, I had been struggling with a bad back leading up to the race so it became a case of just getting it done. I managed a few short runs in the couple of weeks beforehand then had a positive remedial massage a few days before (thanks to Pat Coogan!) so just about made it round those 26.2 miles. It was a struggle, both mentally and physically, and I still have no idea how I made it over the finish line.

Following New Forest Marathon I was pleased to discover that my poor old back made very steady improvements. I returned to training with my run club and was progressing once again. I made the decision to book in another challenge and entered a trail marathon, Ranscombe Challenge, at the end of October. I did a 15 mile training run the week before and figured I could just about get a marathon done on the back of all the training I had done all year and I was absolutely right. 26.2 miles bagged and I was feeling super positive.

So you would think that running all these distances in one year would make me feel amazing, right? Wrong. Oh so wrong. After Ranscombe I came down with a horrible cold that prevented me from running entirely. I tried not to beat myself up about this as actually, the cold was well timed and my body now had time to recover from the marathon distance before I put it through anything else. I am someone who does not get ill very often so I am the worst patient and felt very sorry for myself.

A week post race and the cold was beginning to subside, I felt that it might be time to get some recovery miles in the bag. I then received the sad news that one of my run club friends, Wim, had passed away suddenly and this hit me very hard. I have struggled with training since. He was a special man who was always such a big presence and someone you would look forward to having a laugh with at run club and parkrun. The thought of him not being there on training nights was inconceivable.

In an attempt to restore some kind of motivation, I signed up to race Cross Country for the first time. I ran the first two races and felt absolutely nothing. This should be something that is right up my street. Racing as part of a team, wearing trail shoes, running in new places. But I felt nothing at all. I couldn’t tell you 1 thing I loved about them or 1 thing I hated about them. Apart from going to the pub with my run club on the way home…but this is far from the point.

This lack of motivation combined with a blue few weeks, my boyfriend and favourite running buddy being out of action, and also a very minor hamstring niggle has led me to the decision to take a couple of weeks away from running. I have joined a gym to help maintain fitness and I will still continue to walk/hike a lot so I get to experience that sense of adventure that I love about running. I am not going to stress about it. I have no major races booked until May 2020 so there is no need to panic just yet. Currently I am not missing running in the slightest.

I have experienced this lack of mojo before and after a week without running the sense of guilt starts to make an appearance but I haven’t felt anything yet which can only be a good sign, right? I am hoping that after another week, with more time on my hands to reflect, I will start to remember what it is that I love about running and will want to get back out there. But if that doesn’t happen I will just give it more time. 4 marathon/marathon plus distances in a year is an amazing achievement but it seems that with great achievement also comes a great big, fat comedown.

Running is my chosen hobby, no one forces me to do it, so if it is no longer feeling fun then maybe a break is just what I need.